Wife insults her husband what to do. Keyhole: "My wife constantly insults me

Many women strive to show that they are the main ones in the family, using the tactics of psychological pressure on their spouse. Reproaches and endless mockery with or without cause become a habit and are a way of self-expression. Life is boring for such women, and there is simply no one to quarrel with and let go of their negative emotions. Their pleasure is the humiliation of another person, the husband is always in the field of view.

Of course, living under the same roof with a person and not having any contact at all is hardly possible. Psychologists identify one key reason why a woman allows herself to be rude towards a man: if she has a higher social position and, therefore, earns many times more than her life partner. Instead of support, a man constantly receives criticism in his address, a wife cuts her lover every day and as a preventive measure.

A disappointing trend in the modern world - the majority of such couples. Many women are simply used to making all decisions for their chosen ones. It is much easier to command than to seek a compromise. A calm and balanced man is ready to follow any instructions of his woman, so long as she does not "saw" him. The lady feels like a commander, because if she does not give an order, it is unlikely that anything will be done at all. At least they see this situation in their own light and will not tolerate if a man does not adhere to the rules they have established.

A woman humiliates a man because she herself has many masculine qualities and therefore she suppresses her partner. On a subconscious level, it seems to her that humiliation will allow her to suppress the male in herself, but in the end everything turns out exactly the opposite. How to get out of this vicious circle? Only feelings and the very balance of the balance of the feminine and masculine in oneself will help in such a situation. Instead of taking and understanding this imbalance that is present, a person begins to criticize and actively express his emotions in order to quickly get rid of the energy of the collision of two opposites inside.

How to save a relationship?

Is it possible to somehow come to an understanding and find a way out of this situation? Partners simply do not understand each other, they speak different languages, neglecting the desires of the second half. What kind of respect are we talking about? But it all starts with him! Over the years, a man spends more and more time at home, preferring to watch football on TV and buy beer. This infuriates a woman, and she arranges regular tantrums about this - and again everything is in a circle.

It is not worth continuing to remain silent, it is necessary to gather your thoughts and act. You are unlikely to succeed in remaking a person, but you always need to talk about the problem. By revealing your vectors, you will gradually learn more facets of similarity and difference, and you can play well on this contrast. If the second half has a desire, you can go to an appointment with a psychologist who will help you sort out all your experiences and unravel this emotional tangle. You should make a good habit: just spend more time alone with each other, please with surprises and small gifts. Maybe your wife just lacks attention, and she is trying to piss off a harsh man who rarely speaks words of love and so often keeps all his emotions under control.

It's never too late to reconsider your own behavior, because none of us are perfect, and it's easier to complain to friends about your woman than to do something. It's easier to run away from the problem for years, but this snowball accumulates and very soon it will cover you headlong, like an avalanche. Watch your wife, she probably lacks hobbies, girlfriends, something new and bright in her life. Try to push her to this thought and see how a woman will change next to you, who until recently fought in hysterics, sprinkled you with curses and sent you on all four sides.

Remember one thing: nothing can be perfect, and relationships in a couple are always built differently. Someone is always cold and distant, others have endless passions, and there are those who have prescribed the conditions of their interaction in the marriage contract. Relationships in couples are different, but first of all, there should be respect and awareness that you are doing something wrong. It is never too late to find the right words and just apologize, remember this when you once again start a scandal, or vice versa, silently listen to your wife in the kitchen.

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Therefore, the spouse must try to prevent the wife from even thinking about his indifference. You must always be courteous and attentive to a woman.

When aggression on the part of a woman is due to problems with her health, there is only one way out - to see a doctor as soon as possible. It is the husband who should notice dangerous changes in the behavior of his wife and make a timely decision to visit a specialist of the appropriate profile. It is not uncommon for prolonged depression and a constant negative attitude to end in a suicide attempt. The attention of the husband will help to notice the signs of a possible illness of the wife in time and prevent a disastrous outcome.
If the wife's behavior model is copied from the family of her parents, it will be quite difficult to cope with the situation.

The wife is used to doing this. If at the very beginning of the relationship a man was silent, when his wife first humiliated him, then it became fixed in her mind that he allowed such behavior.
The husband did not indicate his dominant or at least equal position with his wife in the family hierarchy.

The reasons may be different, for example, if the wife earns much more than her husband, so she considers herself entitled to humiliate him. According to many women, if a man does not cope with his role as a provider, he does not deserve respect.

The wife has too many responsibilities that she cannot physically handle.

Attention

The wife will become a little happier and will stop taking out her anger caused by fatigue on her husband.

If a man has not hugged and kissed his wife for a long time, he needs to take care of it. You should not try to hug a woman when she is angry with her husband and expresses her claims - in this case, hugs will be regarded not as a sign of attention, but as an attempt to extinguish the conflict with the help of manipulation.

In the future, you should pay more attention to your wife - celebrate a successful haircut or a well-fitting dress, gently hug her when she passes by, kiss when meeting and parting, give a hand when leaving the transport. Such behavior will not go unnoticed - perhaps mutual feelings will flare up with renewed vigor, and all claims will be quickly forgotten. After all, for any woman there is nothing more offensive than the indifference of a beloved man.

What actions should be taken if the wife humiliates her husband?
How to save a relationship?
Enough to endure it: the man defends his point of view

Of course, living under the same roof with a person and not having any contact at all is hardly possible.

wife insults

Under no circumstances should this be done. Tell your spouse that if she is worried about your health, let her tell you about it quietly so that no one will hear. You can’t humiliate a man, especially in public, as this greatly reduces self-esteem and kills feelings.

How to make a wife not humiliate her husband. So that your wife does not humiliate you, try to talk to her and explain that with every scandal your feelings fade away. And all this can end in parting, and forever. Also say that you are a man first and will not allow you to communicate in this tone and in this way. Find out what to give for a wedding. How to behave so that your wife does not humiliate you. If a woman even once allows herself to humiliate you with impunity, she will repeat it again and again.

What to do if a wife humiliates her husband?

Any person will be horrified when he finds out what kind of example is set for children, and will try to explain to a woman that in no case should one quarrel in the presence of a child. When the spouse realizes that everyone unanimously condemns her behavior, she most likely will no longer risk doing this. If you cannot change the unsatisfactory relationship on your own, it is advisable to contact a family psychologist.

Modern psychology is able to answer many questions of family life, in particular, to resolve conflicts and contribute to the establishment of harmonious relationships in marriage.

Why does a wife humiliate her husband?

He drew attention to the following topic: “if a husband insults his wife” “A husband should not say to his wife that she is not beautiful, and the wife should not say to her husband that he is stupid. If a wife says such words, then what is her intelligence if she married him? And a husband, if he points out the shortcomings of a woman, is not only stupid, but also dishonorable.

Wife offends 1. Divorce on her initiative, as soon as she has a promising vasek. And she will tell you that she didn’t feel like a woman with you, that you don’t understand her, you don’t help, you don’t earn money, sex with you is a torment for her and in general you are a goat.

2. Divorce, again on her initiative, as a result of the measures you are taking to normalize the situation. Because such a situation will require rather drastic measures. The wife saws her husband, one of the reasons for quarrels and partings.

You definitely need to know what to do, what to do if the wife insults!

But women in such a situation behave like children who, being capricious and disobedient, try to attract the attention of their parents.

In the parental family of the wife there was a similar model of behavior. If the wife grew up in a house where the mother of the family constantly insulted and humiliated her father, then she can, without hesitation, copy such relationships in her own adult life.
The wife is jealous of the children to her husband.

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What to do if a wife humiliates her husband?

What to do if the wife humiliates her husband.

How often do we see a wife humiliate her husband? Often. At the same time, the woman is trying to show that she is the main one in the family, but she is very mistaken. It often happens that a woman reproaches her husband for no reason. Just because she is bored, there is no one to quarrel with. There is a type of wife who takes pleasure in humiliating another person, in this case, her husband.

What are the reasons for the humiliation of a husband by his wife?

Very often a wife humiliates her husband if she earns more and has a higher social position. Instead of supporting a loved one and inspiring them to do some deeds that would help in improving their financial situation, she constantly “nags”.

What to do if a woman humiliates a man.

We often see a picture at a party, when the ubiquitous wife controls how much her husband drank. And he does it publicly. Under no circumstances should this be done. Tell your spouse that if she is worried about your health, let her tell you about it quietly so that no one will hear. You can’t humiliate a man, especially in public, as this greatly reduces self-esteem and kills feelings.

How to make a wife not humiliate her husband.

So that your wife does not humiliate you, try to talk to her and explain that with every scandal your feelings fade away. And all this can end in parting, and forever. Also say that you are a man first and will not allow you to communicate in this tone and in this way. Find out what to give for a wedding.

How to behave so that your wife does not humiliate you.

If a woman even once allows herself to humiliate you with impunity, she will repeat it again and again. Therefore, after the first insult, say that in the future, if she allows herself such behavior, you will not communicate with her. And in general, she can lose you. Most women are afraid to be alone.

What to do if the wife humiliates?

You should never let your wife talk to you disrespectfully in front of the kids. If a child sees your humiliation, he will never respect you. And this is unacceptable. You are the head of the family! And point! Find out what you need for a wedding.

The wife humiliates her husband, how to behave and what to do?

There is an exception to the rule when a woman is experiencing postpartum depression. But in this case, kindly and gently, explain to your beloved that this is a temporary phenomenon. Offer your help, and then, perhaps, you will not hear humiliating words addressed to you.

Be patient but fair. Do not forget about your "I". And don't let yourself be trampled into the mud.

You are men!

PSYCHOLOGIST'S ADVICE

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Keyhole: "My wife always insults me"

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My wife and I are very different, - says Nikolai. - I am calm and compromising. She is active and proud. I love her. Despite all the shortcomings, she is the best. Only one trait of her character does not allow us to stay together - she is very rude.

The wife is never shy in expressions. Even swearing is like native to her. And when necessary, she uses it. I tolerate it. I am terribly uncomfortable when someone swears. But if I make a remark to her, she rejects me. And it's also awkward.

The slightest oversight on my part, which one might not notice, for example, dripped tea on the floor, it turns into a tragedy and scandal. One winds on the other, grows like a snowball. And I'm already guilty of all mortal sins. She turns herself on, goes to scream, calls names. This is very embarrassing! I certainly did not deserve such insults for spilling a drop of tea on the floor. And why, for every little thing, do I need to remember everything that I did wrong?! Isn't it time to forget that two years ago I forgot to close the window and her beloved cat fell out into the street and got lost? Or that I scratched my car six months ago while parking in the yard? Even a cup that was broken last week is still relevant. And I think my wife will remember her for a couple more months.

The most innocent insult is a clinical idiot. This has become my favorite feature of her lately. This is where it usually starts. And then it develops to such a point that it is simply a shame to speak.

At the same time, after the scandal, she never asks for forgiveness, even if she obviously overdoes it. He considers himself absolutely right in everything. And, no matter how ridiculous, she is waiting for me to come to her with an apology. Now this is driving me crazy! No matter how calm I am by nature, but to endure all this, to live like this every day is unbearable!

PSYCHOLOGIST'S OPINION

Inna SHIFANOVA:

Nicholas and his wife have a very different upbringing. Apparently, the girl grew up in a family where screaming and scandal were considered the norm, and in Nikolai's family it was not customary to express negative emotions. But in this situation, something else is alarming - increased attention to detail. The wife reproaches the guy for breaking the mug and opening the window. This suggests that something is broken in their relationship. Apparently, mutual tenderness has passed. Or the feeling that united them before has passed. In any case, their problems are much deeper than just the rudeness of his wife. After all, she had been rude before, and Nikolai was fine with that.

“Sister-in-law evicted us from home”

My daughter-in-law got what she wanted! Anna says. - For the sake of this I came to Moscow, for the sake of this I slept with my son. For the sake of this, she gave birth to a child, when she could not take it with her bare hands! And now, please, she lives in our three-room apartment, and she pushed us all into a one-room apartment!

My daughter-in-law is a model. On it, you can write books about impudent provincial women who came to conquer the capital and rake in everything for themselves. Our Lenochka is a flower girl in appearance. You can't tell from her what she really is!

I met my son a year and a half ago. Enough so for him undertook, immediately came to get acquainted with us. I hinted to my son that the girl was insincerely communicating with him, that the benefits of civilization seduced her, and not his nature. He waved it off, yelled. And now I got mine!

She quickly took him to the registry office. Then my son began to understand who he had contacted, and it seemed that he was already ready to take the first smart step in his life - to divorce her, and she foresaw this, she became pregnant. Yes, and kept it a secret at first. Because when she said it, it was already too late to do anything. Smart, prudent!

A win-win! The son, of course, softened. He began to indulge her in everything.

A child was born - and that's it. Now, I'm afraid, everything is already lost for my husband and I - the girl threw us out of her life, the life of our son and grandson.

The son persuaded her husband to rewrite a large apartment for them. They strongly advised us to move to a one-room apartment, which we built just for our son. But all decisions are made by my husband. He succumbed to persuasion, and he loves his grandson very much and does not understand why the daughter-in-law seems to me such a monster. In general, everything turned out as she had planned from the very beginning. And the fact that we laid down our lives to achieve all this, of course, no one remembers. Our lives are on the side.

PSYCHOLOGIST'S OPINION

Inna SHIFANOVA:

The fact that the girl became pregnant on the eve of the divorce and hid this fact, of course, is alarming and makes one doubt her sincerity. But in any case, at the moment, Anna can no longer change anything - all decisions are made for her. In principle, the situation may worsen, and the daughter-in-law will forbid Anna to communicate with her grandson. However, if you maintain at least formally neutral relations with the girl, then this will not happen. And you can't lose contact with your son.

If you are hooked by these stories or there is a situation that you want to discuss with the readers of our newspaper, write. We are waiting for your letters (preferably with a photo) by mail marked: Moscow department, to the "Keyhole"; by email: [email protected]

Every girl, having married, dreams of a happy marriage, in which love and mutual understanding will reign. And certainly, not a single representative of the fair sex suggests that her husband can be reincarnated as an ever-screaming monster. What to do if the husband constantly insults and humiliates, the advice of a psychologist will give the answer.

You are a loving wife, a good housewife and a caring mother, you are respected by work colleagues, you are always well-groomed and do not give rise to jealousy. He is always unhappy. Any little thing causes him an attack of aggression, resulting in a stream of abuse and insults. Neither tears, nor persuasion, nor reciprocal abuse not only change nothing, but also aggravate the situation even more. Why does a husband insult and humiliate his wife, it will help to get to the bottom of the truth

His parents had a similar relationship.

A child who grew up in a family where there is no mutual understanding, and the father is constantly rude to the mother, is very likely to choose a similar behavior model. You can’t blame him for this, because he had no other life experience.

Blame his complexes or jealousy.

Notorious men, with low self-esteem, are trying to assert themselves in this way. Experts explain that by morally suppressing his wife, telling her that she is ugly, a cow, a brainless chicken, and so on, a man becomes more perfect in his mind. Such types tend to speak in a similar way about other people from his environment. The situation is aggravated if the spouse is successful at work. To lower her self-esteem, as if bringing it closer to his level, the aggressor resorts to insults.

Problems not related to the spouse.

The trouble of a man is that, pursuing a good goal, not to dump his difficulties on loved ones, he eventually unconsciously splashes out the accumulated negativity on his loved one. This also happens because the husband believes that the spouse, instead of supporting him, will begin to condemn him, or simply, her opinion is not authoritative for him.

Out of love.

The prerequisites for this may be different, but it all comes down to one thing, life with an unloved person turns into hell. Why does a husband call names to his wife, instead of sitting down at the negotiating table and calmly discussing everything, psychology explains this behavior with an individual feature of a person, laid down in childhood.

There is a comparison with someone:

this happens in families where the husband is a sissy, he believes that you should do everything the same way as his mother;
another option is, of course, the comparison is not in your favor;
the third option - he has a second marriage, and he compares you with his predecessor.

The husband calls names and humiliates, because, in his opinion, you do not correspond to the ideal invented by him, the psychologist's advice is not to take what was said personally, this is only his subjective assessment.

You provoke him.

Yes, dear ladies, you are not angels either. Perhaps, instead of paying attention to your spouse, you watch TV shows for hours or chat on the phone with your girlfriends. Or you have a constant headache, you know what I'm talking about. Such behavior can be provoked by unflattering comments about his relatives or loved ones, defiant clothing or arrogance towards him. Lacking communication skills, men scream trying to get what they want.

Disagreements happen in every family. This is understandable, we are living people, with our own character and mood. But if, and there are no visible reasons for this, the advice of a psychologist will help you understand what to do in each case.

Analyze the circumstances under which an attack of aggression occurs:

the spouse is under the influence of alcohol or other psychostimulants;
he is sober;
it only happens in private with you;
it allows you to be insulted in front of children and in public.

How to behave if a husband constantly insults and humiliates his wife, you will understand by delving into the psychology of relationships.

Of course, it is difficult to understand in a state of constant ora whether you love your spouse, but you need to admit to yourself that there is something to maintain relationships for or constant negativity crosses out all the good.
How do you respond to aggression in the current situation: respond with aggression or withdraw into yourself.
How often do such scandals occur and what provokes.
What state is the spouse in during a quarrel: drunk or sober.
Does he have complexes, perhaps this is an inherited behavior pattern.

In what case will love and patient work on relationships save?

If you realize that it provokes your husband to inappropriate behavior and there is a strong desire to restore, experts advise:

Say, "Stop, I don't intend to keep talking loudly," and don't continue talking until the decibel level drops to normal.
Don't be like a screaming spouse. When, in response to insults, the husband hears how wonderful he is and sincerely surprises you how such a strong person is able to show weakness by raising his voice to a defenseless woman. The absence of a backlash will nullify attacks of aggression.
Stop provoking if the faithful do not like some actions or appearance, and it is in your power to correct this without prejudice to your interests and not to the detriment of health, make such indulgence.
Be tactful. If your husband is jealous of your success, present it in such a way that only thanks to his support you managed to achieve something.
Do not criticize his tastes, do not speak badly about his loved ones, do not emphasize the mistakes made.

Point out to him that his aggressive behavior hurts you. If he is annoyed by your behavior or appearance, tell him that you are sorry and that you did not mean to provoke such a reaction.

What should not be allowed?

Not allowed:

To fight in front of the children.
You can’t bring yourself to a state in which you can’t cope with such a mental load on your own.
Do not put up with circumstances if the boorish attitude of the husband is the way of his life.

What to do if the husband insults: psychology and action plan

You conducted an analysis of what was happening, did work on the mistakes, patiently performed. He believes that everything that happens between you is the norm, they say, the dear ones scold, they only amuse themselves. What to do if the husband insults and humiliates, how to bring relations back to normal - we apply the advice of a psychologist:

Leave the house. Even if you haven't made the decision to end the relationship yet, your departure may sober him up. Cut off communication for a week, do not answer calls and attempts to see each other. Upon your return, make it clear that a peaceful life without his participation suits you more. And whether you stay together depends on how willing he is to change. If you are ready, do not give concessions, but do not reproach the past either. First of all, treat yourself with respect, show nobility, helping your husband overcome negative qualities.
Try to ignore the attack of aggression. Go to another room, and when the flow of insults dries up, calmly but confidently say: “I don’t take offense at you, because I know for sure that the abominations you shouted out reflect only your internal state and have nothing to do with reality. I am sure that if you take it out on me, then you yourself need help. I am ready to support you and overcome your weakness. But in the future, I don’t want to see these tantrums, otherwise it will end in the breakup of our marriage.”
When you are in a crowded place, but without children and acquaintances, ask him some hard-hitting questions. A crowded place will keep him from an outburst of anger, usually domestic despots in public behave with restraint, fearing a negative assessment of others.

Ask your spouse:

About children: does he understand that looking at his behavior, children will perceive such relationships as normal and, becoming adults, will resort to the same behavior model. Does he want his son to humiliate his wife in the same way and live in an unhappy marriage. Does he want his daughter to be abused by her husband. Does he realize that his children are not only afraid of him, but also feel hatred towards him. That they are intimidated and all the time are in Do you know that in order to form a normal psyche, they need a balanced mother and an example of respectable relationships. How does he think the kids respect him.
About your relationship: what needs to be done to make the relationship calm. Is there someone who replaces you. Does he enjoy his behavior? Can you fix the situation. Is he himself the ideal man to demand this from you. Does he love you and if so, why can't this be done without scandals.
About him: why did he choose such a method for self-assertion. Is he ready to change with your help. Can someone else help him, from your environment.

This conversation should get through to his mind and reconsider his views on your relationship. It is important that you remain calm and confident in what you are saying during the conversation.

Unfortunately, not all problems can be solved on your own and then you will need the help of specialists:

the husband is addicted to psychotropic substances, after the use of which aggression is manifested;
moral violence is accompanied by beatings;
there is a serious mental disorder, resulting in attacks of aggression;
spouses want to solve the problem, but due to lack of experience, they do not succeed.

Working with a psychologist-hypnologist Nikita Valerievich Baturin will help you cope with the problem that has arisen.

Save the relationship does not make sense:

the husband no longer loves and speaks openly about it. The reasons are different, including the appearance of another woman. It is unlikely that it will be possible to save a family, and sacrificing oneself and children is a huge mistake;
more than one wife suffers from the abuse of the aggressor, but the children also have mental problems;
The wife dislikes her husband.

In some cases, the husband constantly insults and humiliates, if the actions or inaction of the wife allow him to do this, the advice of a psychologist will help to sort out the relationship.

The husband constantly screams and insults his wife: we understand systematically

There is another kind of aggression. Usually, young spouses with a vulnerable psyche experience anxiety: my husband calls me a foul language, how to behave, the advice of a psychologist will help.

Reason 1: for a husband, this is a normal style of communication, he does not understand how unpleasant this is for you.

What to do: methodically convey to your spouse that this style of communication does not suit you.

Reason 2: Husband defends his personal space.

What to do: respect the boundaries of personal space.

Reason 3: initially there was a disrespectful style of communication. Perhaps you yourself provoke such a reaction from your husband by your communication, but you do it without obscene expressions.

What to do: analyze your communication style, change behavior.

Reason 4: in this way, the husband quickly achieves what he wants.

What to do: think with your spouse how, without resorting to obscene expressions, to achieve what he wants.

Whether your marriage will be happy and long depends on daily work on relationships, mutual love, tolerance and respect for each other.

Although each of us undoubtedly strives for harmony and mutual respect in marriage, it is not always possible to achieve such an ideal. In the life of spouses there are difficult periods and unpleasant ups and downs. But all of them can be overcome if there is a spiritual relationship and sincere feelings between the partners. But in some couples, situations may arise when one of the spouses very often or almost constantly expresses dissatisfaction with the partner. The reasons and methods for overcoming the constant dissatisfaction of the wife with her husband will be discussed in this article.

Causes

The psychology of the relationship of a married couple is by no means simple. The expression “darlings scold, only amuse”, indicating the frivolity of conflicts and quarrels, is not true in all cases.

It is not uncommon for men in marriage to find themselves forced to live in a difficult and hostile environment. The wife is always dissatisfied with her husband, often offends for no reason, makes far-fetched and unreasonable demands and claims. If there are children in the family, such an unfavorable environment has a very negative effect on their emotional and mental health. Unfortunately, often men in such a situation simply break down in response, showering their soulmate with rude words and reproaches. As a result, scandals exhausting both partners occur almost every day in the house.

Both spouses should approach the solution of such a problem with full seriousness. It is important for a man to figure out what is the reason for such behavior and the almost constantly excited state of his partner. The wife also needs to work on her psychological difficulties. She should try to find a way out not in the sphere of scandals and systematic humiliation of a loved one, but in rational methods of correction and control of the psycho-emotional state.

Consider the possible reasons for the discord in family relations in a couple, because of which the wife is always rude, insults and expresses dissatisfaction without objective reasons.

Often, such violations in relationships lead to problems in the sexual life of the couple. Being unsatisfied with sexual relations for a long time, but being unable, embarrassed or unwilling to express it, a woman gradually accumulates emotional stress. Over time, stress only increases, and the spouse begins to unconsciously look for relaxation in the domestic sphere. Many women do not associate sexual life with their psychological state at all. This greatly complicates the awareness and subsequent resolution of problems in relationships.

A barrier to the establishment of family life is the shyness of one or both spouses. Partners are not ready to competently discuss sex, express mutual wishes to each other, point out any negative points. A similar situation, when a couple does not have a healthy sex life that satisfies both partners, greatly complicates relationships outside of bed.

Emotional remoteness of the spouses, lack of common interests and opposition of characters greatly complicate family life. It is not uncommon for a situation where the choice of a man for marriage was somewhat forced. Unfortunately, even today there are still marriages of convenience or at the insistence of parents. The reason for such an inappropriate union can also be an unplanned pregnancy. In any case, it is almost certain that such partners, cohabiting in marriage, will be deprived of a sincere spiritual relationship.

Lack of common interests and common ground will complicate normal communication. But living side by side, it is impossible to ignore the existence of each other. Therefore, the reasons for communication, in this case - negatively colored, are simply contrived. This results in nit-picking, reproaches, insults from one or both spouses.

The reason that a woman scolds her husband may be that the family setting she observed as a child. In other words, a girl or woman, having entered into marriage and started a life together with a man, unconsciously repeats the scenario of building relationships that she saw with her parents. Often in such cases, even childhood psychological trauma occurs if the girl had to watch difficult scenes of scandals and even violence.

The parents of the wife can also aggravate the situation in the family. Most often, the mother intervenes in the relationship of the daughter. A mother-in-law may speak negatively about her son-in-law. Often, an adult woman can even embark on adventures in order to humiliate her unwanted chosen one in the eyes of her daughter. The situation is even more aggravated if the spouses live in the same house or apartment with the wife's parents.

The reason for the sharp and rude behavior of the wife may lie in the negative traits of the character of the man himself. The wife is thus forced to defend herself or defend her interests. Often, husbands openly show unreasonable jealousy, possessiveness, limit the freedom of the second half, preventing her from realizing her interests and engaging in hobbies. Deprived of communication with friends, not having the opportunity to do something interesting for herself, in addition to work and family, a woman, in response, vents her emotional stress on her spouse.

Severe consequences for the psycho-emotional sphere of a woman have experienced episodes of violence, including sexual violence, by a man. It can be a beating of a father, and severe fights with an older brother, rape by a partner or an unfamiliar man. If a woman did not receive psychological help and could not cope with the trauma on her own (which is possible in very rare cases), then fear, resentment, helplessness before brute force remain in her subconscious for a long time. This is a very difficult situation that requires long-term rehabilitation and work with a psychotherapist. Women are most often ashamed of such an experience, and the husband may not even know that his wife was once abused. Therefore, it cannot even imagine that the root of the problematic behavior of the second half lies precisely there.

How to build relationships?

Of course, a loving spouse certainly wants to return a calm and friendly atmosphere to his family. However, it is worth setting yourself up for the fact that this may not be possible to do as quickly as we would like. In any relationship, marital or premarital, patience plays an important role. It is this quality that is important to stock up, setting out to preserve and strengthen your marriage.

Psychologist's advice for men

Help your wife find a way out of difficult situations for her, support during problems at work. All this will help her relieve stress and calm down.

Don't ignore problems in your sex life. Talk to your spouse about her feelings during intimacy. If both you and your wife are not ready to discuss this issue, do not be afraid to contact a sexual relationship specialist. All over the world, couples visit such counselors, and this helps to strengthen the marriage, build mutual understanding, and often prevents divorces.
Objectively evaluate your behavior, habits, manner of communication with your spouse. Self-analysis of one's personal qualities is useful in any situation. Often we reproach a loved one for what we regularly do ourselves.
Husbands often make the mistake of trying to please their other half in every conflict. Of course, you need to make contact and correct really committed mistakes. But here indulging unreasonable demands, insults and nit-picking is still not worth it. This will not get rid of the core of the problem.

How to behave during quarrels and conflicts with your wife?

Simple advice should be followed.

Try to be calm, do not respond with rudeness to rudeness, do not escalate the situation. Constructive adequate communication is much more effective than a heated quarrel.
If the spouse cannot calm down in any way and does not make contact, perhaps you should leave her alone for a while. Go to another room for a while or go for a walk. Before doing this, gently tell your wife that her words are very hurtful for you, and that you are ready to give her time to recover, and then calmly discuss the problem with her.
Learn emotional control techniques. For example, breath count. To calm down, do not quickly count to yourself to 4, taking a uniform breath, hold your breath for another 4 counts at the same pace, then exhale evenly for 8 counts.

2-3 minutes of this exercise is enough to get back to normal. Tell your wife about this or another effective technique for you and do it together during a tense situation.

At the beginning of life together, relations change and they are transformed into a new quality. At this moment, the question arises of what to do if the wife is constantly yelling and sawing. Men, as a rule, do not want to change something in a relationship and are quite happy with it as it is. However, they do not understand that if you do not take care all the time that the relationship is good, they will definitely deteriorate.

Why is the woman unhappy?

There are several reasons for your woman's constant dissatisfaction. First: she wants the attention and romance that was at the beginning of the relationship. Of course, it is impossible for the candy-bouquet period to last forever, but signs of attention are a manifestation of love for a woman, and not at all how much money you earn. Therefore, if you want to change your wife's irritability to mercy, start with a bouquet of flowers and a box of her favorite sweets.

In general, in order for a man to devote more time to them, set aside at least a couple of evenings a week for talking with her and part of the day off for movies, walking, spending time with her. Then she will easily let you go to meetings with friends and perceive delays at work. A woman really wants your attention, because when she does not receive it, it begins to seem to her that you are moving away and no longer love her. Then her resentment begins to manifest itself in the form of "piling" and "shouting" for petty reasons.

You just need to make sure that the woman is happy, and a happy woman wants to take care, give her love and walk with a wonderful mood.

be able to negotiate

Life is full of conflicts, both in the work team and in the family, simply because all people are different and our desires rarely coincide. Therefore, we must learn to negotiate. And in the case when it is impossible to agree, our children's desires will help to decide who is in charge in the family and stop the endless competition "who is stronger".

A little girl, dreaming of a prince and marriage, hardly imagines herself as a grumpy old woman sending an old man to a goldfish to fulfill her desires. She wants a happy family life, in which she is raising obedient children and feels behind her husband like behind a stone wall. After all, the main thing for a woman is the absence of problems.

The young man does not imagine himself as a loser who has descended into a quitter lying on the couch, or even worse, into an alcoholic. He sees himself as a hero. A hero in work, when you rejoice that you have overcome all difficulties and have done something that not everyone is capable of. He wants to become the best in creativity, science, sports, and in general, so that others look at him and admire how well and correctly he did everything. After all, the received gratitude for what he has done gives him this feeling of a winner. Without such a prize, he would not even consider victory a victory.

Is a man controlled by a woman capable of becoming a hero? No. Can a woman protected by insincere pseudo-care (if only she quickly shut up) can a woman be happy and loving? No. That joy and state of happiness that we dreamed about in childhood is often forgotten by adults. Even from birth, nature has established a natural order and hierarchy - a woman cannot command her husband, and the husband is obliged to protect his wife. Despite the fact that a woman can really manage and make decisions regarding a large number of issues, she will not acquire the status of the head of the family, even unspoken.

Often a man does not insist on his own where necessary and his wife does not listen to him, and he, struggling with his own humiliation, makes attempts to become the head of the family. But if a woman begins to yield, then the husband will yield to her, with joy. However, if a man arrogantly insists on his own all the time, he loses the respect of his wife.

So that the wife does not saw, you need to make her happier and establish an adequate hierarchy in family relationships.

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It is unpleasant for any man to listen to insults addressed to him from a person with whom he connected his life with family ties. It's humiliating. The partner wants to know the reasons for the aggressive behavior of the chosen one, how to behave in this situation and whether it is possible to save the marriage.

Causes

There are various reasons for the humiliation of the head of the family by the representative of the weaker sex.

The reason may be high earnings or the status of his wife. She earns more and considers herself entitled to humiliate her husband, who is not the main breadwinner, to find fault with him. The man is losing control. It is difficult for him to compete with a lucky lady.
Some women begin to compare their spouse with a more successful neighbor, acquaintance, friend's husband. The wife is annoyed that they have a decent income, which, as it seems to her, is higher than their material well-being.

Instead of providing support, a woman insults and humiliates her husband, reduces his authority in the eyes of children. The chosen one forgets that it is she who is called upon to inspire her betrothed to masculine deeds, to financial success.

Sometimes aggressive behavior appears as a result of a misunderstanding of the personality psychology of the chosen one. The wife neglects his desires, gets angry with him, undeservedly offends the faithful, insults him in every possible way. There is no harmony and respect for each other in such relations.
Some people take pleasure in humiliating another person, especially their own spouse.
Sometimes women have no one to quarrel with. She chooses her husband as an object for a splash of her negative emotions.
Sometimes a wife humiliates her husband in public, reprimands in the presence of strangers. In this case, it is necessary to talk with the chosen one face to face, explain to her that she can express any displeasure to him quietly, in a whisper, or present her claims later in private.
Often a woman ceases to have enough compliments and attention from her beloved. On a subconscious level, she tries to draw attention to her person with screams and swearing. The spouse does not realize that it is impossible to return love with aggressive behavior. The gap that has arisen between a married couple is widening.
If the parent family had a similar pattern of behavior. The mother always dominated, humiliating and insulting her husband. The daughter just copies the actions of the parent.

A woman may have too many household responsibilities, and her husband does not want to help her. In this case, she has an inadequate reaction to the behavior of the chosen one. The reason is a banal overwork: too many worries fell on her shoulders. The inaction of the faithful causes negative emotions on the part of the wife.
Sometimes a lady cannot cope with the load at work, and at home she breaks down on her own husband.
Health problems, hormonal disruptions can also cause causeless mood swings in a woman.
The wife may experience aggression due to the jealousy of the children to the betrothed. A domineering woman tries to suppress the personality of her husband and her children, who involuntarily begin to reach out to a soft and accommodating father. The mother begins to deliberately say unpleasant things about their adored parent in front of the children, to scold and humiliate him. The younger generation, instead of the expected contempt for a weak man, begins to show pity. The woman is even more jealous of the children.

What can offend him?

Some women throw all their negative emotions, which have nothing to do with their husband, onto him. Thus, the husband becomes the culprit of all her troubles. Often, a man begins to form a sense of guilt. Resentment builds up in his heart. The self-esteem of a man decreases, feelings for the missus gradually fade away. Endless control on the part of the chosen one, providing a scenario for further actions of a man greatly strains him. Regularly received female directives offend the partner.

An attempt by a spouse to change her chosen one does not lead to success. The wife constantly criticizes her husband, calls him names, thereby trying to adjust to her ideal. Gradually, male grievances accumulate. He is no longer able to tolerate the bad attitude of the chosen one. A painful blow inflicted on a man's pride is often an unreasonable refusal of the second half in intimacy. This resentment will not go away on its own. It needs to be worked out. An entry on a piece of paper about a decrease in the frequency of sex, a look at the situation from the outside will help you make the right decision.

A husband can hold a grudge against his wife if she ignores his efforts to raise children, help with the housework, and an excellent attitude towards her parents and relatives. The husband is trying his best, but the other half does not notice, takes his actions for granted. Appreciate your husband, do not forget to express gratitude to the faithful in time - the necessary actions. Different perceptions of the same things by partners widen the gap between spouses.

Accumulated grievances can cause aggression, contribute to the outbreak of quarrels over trifles. Unforgiven grievances can lead to the destruction of a marriage. You don't need to silence them. It's best to work through the problem together. The more grievances accumulate, the more difficult it is to deal with them.

What should a husband do?

Any humiliation and insults on the part of the wife should be stopped immediately. Repeat action is not allowed. After the first case, it is necessary to explain to the woman that negative attacks in his direction are not allowed. The husband will not tolerate them even in the name of love. It is best to immediately notify the woman that repeated humiliation and insults will end in parting. If the wife utters offensive words, humiliates, insults, one should not respond in kind. It is necessary to calm her down, try to find kind words, reconcile with her. In no case should you raise your voice, try to shout it down. It's good when both have a great sense of humor. It is best to translate insults into jokes.

Neglect in front of children is unacceptable, as respect for the father is reduced. The man should always be the head of the family. The spouse himself should never mock his betrothed and endure ridicule on her part. The exception is toxicosis during pregnancy and postpartum depression. The appearance of a baby in the family can affect the behavior of a woman. During this period, it is necessary to treat the young mother reverently, gently and with great care. An affectionate husband will not become an object for insults and humiliation.

No need to compare the obstinate wife with others. She is the same dear and close person, like a child, whom it is impossible to be offended by. At such moments, it is worth treating your soulmate as a small child. Male power will be preserved if it is possible to make the wife feel fragility. The chosen one should feel in reliable male hands.

How to save a marriage?

It is not easy to regain the trust and love of a wife. The imposition of their own conditions, rudeness, abuse, nit-picking have a destructive effect on marital relations. Feelings in such situations weaken. The desire of the wife to be the head of the family, to command her husband often leads to discord and a complete break in relations. It takes a lot of patience to save a marriage.

It is easy to love a tender, flexible soul mate. It is necessary to work hard to surround with care and attention a grumpy and hysterical betrothed. This is a kind of feat. The secret of family happiness lies in caring for each other. Choosing the right response to the wife's accusations is an important factor. In some situations, an apology is sufficient. The regular manifestation of tenderness, attention and love strengthens the marital bond. A woman wants to see a reliable man next to her. Feeling like behind a stone wall, she turns into a meek wife. A friendly discussion of pressing problems leads to family unity. Joint exits to various events, walks strengthen the relationship of the spouses. Visiting various exhibitions, cinemas, museums unite the family. You can captivate your wife with your hobby and make it common.

It is necessary to develop the habit of periodically presenting small gifts to each other, to please the chosen one with pleasant surprises. After all, a woman may simply lack the attention of a restrained husband. We must learn to bring joy to a loved one, to give a good mood.

Not only life unites family ties. The overall family budget will help to avoid reproaches related to the financial insolvency of a man. Hiding money is unacceptable. Reliance on a loved one is a sign of a close-knit family. A woman with a good income should be glad that she has the opportunity to help her loved ones and relatives. Kindness and selflessness contribute to the creation of a strong family.

The value system needs to be changed. The transition from the pursuit of material wealth to the spiritual plane leads to a rich life. It doesn't matter who is the main breadwinner in the family, if only the marital hearth was filled with warmth and love. It is important to make every effort to change the leader in a marital relationship. The wise head of the family is revered by the household, listen to his advice. When a wife tries to restrain her irritation and completely obey her husband, then unanimity is born in the family. The ability to hear each other eliminates all differences.